What companies have in common with Bomfunk MC´s

July 7, 2017

Cheeeeese Staright from the top of my dog – Assa rockarockarockarocka Rockamackaphone!
Do you know the song? If not, listen to it here.

“Freestyler” by Bomfunk MC’s, one of my childhood theme songs. In 1999, me and my fellow snotty 6 year old friends were all happily singing “Rockamackaphone” instead of “Rock the microphone” (And yes people of the 1980s and older, I was one of those snotty kids in 1999).

Most of us problaby understood that “Rockamackafon” had some meaning, but we had zero interest in figuring out what mr Bomfunk actually sang about. “Rockamackafon” was most likely some cool hiphop word and if he had access to some kind of cheese from the top of his dog, that was fine by us – whatever floats your boat mr Bomfunk.

“Freestyler” and corporate bullshit

My childhood experience of the song “Freestyler” represents how I read texts that uses a language filled with corporate cliches and industry terms – aka Corporate bullshit – very well.

My brain automatically skips the words that I don’t know or have a weak connection to. It is like with “Rockamackafon”: I understand that these fancy words have some meaning, but when an unknown term appears on a website, my brain just freestyles by pure laziness and makes up words – I read but I don’t truly understand.

I love throwing stones in glass houses – here’s an example from our site

This is a sentence from our own website: “We are platform-independent and work extensively with open source software such as WordPress, Drupal and Magento, but we also have expertise in closed systems such as EPiServer.”

I remember reading this sentence for the first time, before I started working at Pingbull. This was pretty much my experience: “We are schublubliblu-independent and work with somethingsomething soft stuffs such as Blogtool, Drudidi, Magnetoor, but we also have expertise in … systems such as Ep…”…

If you are selling buttons: write that you are selling buttons

It might be that I have some reading disorder that I should take care off, but I think that a lot of people can recognize themselves in my Rockamackafon-experience when they read the sentence from our website.

That we are saying: “We sell websites. To us it does not matter which system you prefer to use to administrate your site – we prefer WordPress – but can handle most systems.” probably passes most readers by.

This is something that I notice on many corporate websites when they write about themselves and what they do. And I think that we might be losing some customers in the pursuit of sounding competent.

Because, if I want to buy a button and that button is described as “Sealing-solution for garments”, that does not help me, the fancy words does not add value if I can´t understand that you are selling buttons.

People are just not that into you

By this I don’t mean that people are stupid and don’t understand how to google things they don´t get. I just strongly believe that people do not care enough to do that – They are not that into you. People will never care enough to help business make sense if they are unclear.

Of course industry terms have a place on websites, to some target groups it is important to show that you “know the language”. There might also be a purpose of sounding like an authority with a complicated language, but remember mr Bomfunk Mcs: You might sound cool – but some of the people might be singing another lyrics than the one you think you have been singing.

Tags: English, Lova,